Funny Junk » Funny Idiot Fool Jokes

A 9 Year Old Boy

admin — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 04:30:35 +0000

A 9-year-old boy in Manassas, Virginia received a one-day suspension under his elementary schools drug policy last week – for Certs! Joey Hoeffer allegedly told a classmate that the mints would make him “jump higher.”

A Boy Went Into The Local

admin — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 06:43:02 +0000

A boy went into the local department store where he saw a sign on the escalator – Dogs must be carried on this escalator.The boy then spent the next tow hours looking for a dog.

A Guy Walking Down a Street

admin — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 06:17:40 +0000

A guy walking down a street one afternoon passes an old man sitting on the side of the road with a large sack.The younger guy says to the old man, “Watcha got in the sack?”The old man responds, “I got some monkeys in that there sack.”The younger man asks, “If I guess how many monkeys you got in the sack, can I keep one?”The old man replies, “Son, if you guess how many monkeys I got in this sack, Ill give you both of em!”

A Man In a Swimming Pool

admin — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 02:52:45 +0000

A man in a swimming pool was on the very top diving board. He poised, lifted his arms, and was about to dive when the attendant came running up, shouting, “Dont dive ? theres no water in that pool!” “Thats all right,” said the man. “I cant swim!”

A Man Went Into a Pet Shop

admin — Sat, 03 Oct 2009 04:45:40 +0000

A man went into a pet shop to buy a parrot. He was shown an especially fine one which he liked the look of, but he was puzzled by the two strings which were tied to its feet. “What are they for?” he asked the pet shop manager. “Ah well, sir,” came the reply, “thats a very unusual feature of this particular parrot. You see, hes a trained parrot, sir, he used to be in the circus. If you pull the string on his left foot he says Hello and if you pull the string on his left foot he says Goodbye.” “And what happens if you pull both strings at once?” “I fall off my perch, you fool!” screeched the parrot.

A Silly Boy Spent The Afternoon

admin — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 03:47:28 +0000

A silly boy spent the afternoon with some friends, but when the time came for him to leave, a terrific storm started with thunder, lightning and torrential rain.You cant go home in this, said one of his friends, youd better stay the night.Thats very kind of you, said the boy. Ill just run home and get my pyjamas.

Stupid Man Struggling

admin — Sun, 06 Sep 2009 03:06:03 +0000

A stupid man was struggling out of his house with a big table. His neighbor said to him, “Hello, Harry. Where are you going with that then?” And Harry replied, “Im taking it to the store to have it measured for a new tablecloth.”

A Stupid Glazier Was Examining

admin — Sun, 06 Sep 2009 03:04:03 +0000

A stupid glazier was examining a broken window. He looked at it for a while and then said, “Its worse than I thought. Its broken on both sides.”

A Student In Belle

admin — Sat, 05 Sep 2009 04:06:31 +0000

A student in Belle, West Virginia was suspended for three days for giving a classmate a cough drop. School principal Forest Mann reiterated the schools “zero-tolerance” policy…not to be confused with the “zero-intelligence” policy.

According To The Knight Ridder News Service

admin — Sun, 16 Aug 2009 03:41:44 +0000

According to the Knight-Ridder News Service, the inscription on the metal bands used by the U.S. Department of the Interior to tag migratory birds has been changed. The bands used to bear the address of the Washington Biological Survey, abbreviated, “Wash. Biol. Surv.” until the agency received the following letter from an Arkansas camper: “Dear Sirs: While camping last week I shot one of your birds. I think it was a crow. I followed the cooking instructions on the leg tag and I want to tell you it was horrible.”