I Cant Help Pulling Ugly Faces

Witch: Doctor, I can’t help pulling ugly faces. Doctor: Well there’s nothing terrible about that. Witch: It is when the people with ugly faces don’t like them being pulled.

I Never Forget a Face

I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll make an exception.

Why Did The Pig

Why did the pig have ink all over his face? Because it came out of the pen.

My Teacher Got a Pretty Face

My teacher’s got a pretty face if you can read between the lines.

Why Is Your Nose

Why is your nose in the middle of your face? Because it is the scenter (centre).

You Can Read His Mind

You can read his mind in his face. Yes, it’s usually a complete blank.

Fred Do You Like My New Hairstyle

Fred: Do you like my new hairstyle? Harry: In as much as it covers most of your face, yes.

Fred You’ve Got a Roman Nose

Fred: You’ve got a Roman nose. Harry: Like Julius Caesar? Fred: No, it’s roamin’ all over your face.

Fred New Girlfriend

Fred’s new girlfriend uses such greasy lipstick that he has to sprinkle his face with sand to get a better grip.

Patient The Trouble is Doctor

Patient: The trouble is, doctor, I keep pulling ugly faces. Doctor: Don’t worry, I don’t expect anyone will notice.

First Witch I Like Your Toad

First Witch: I like your toad. He always has such a nice expression on his face. Second Witch: It’s because he’s a hoptimist.

You Got a Face Like a Million Dollars

Boy monster: You’ve got a face like a million dollars ! Girl monster: Have I really ? Boy monster: Yes – it’s green and wrinkly !

Teacher What a Glum Face

Teacher: What a glum face, what would you say if I came to school with a face like yours ? Pupil: I’d be too polite to mention it !

I’ve Got The Face of a Teenager

Wife to Husband: I’ll have you know I’ve got the face of a teenager! Husband to Wife: Then you should give it back, you’re wearing it out.

Why is Your Face All Scratched

Why is your face all scratched ? My girlfriend said it with flowers. How romantic. Not really, she hit me round the head with a bunch of thorny roses !

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