Did You Hear About The Granny
Did you hear about the granny who plugged her electric blanket into the toaster by mistake? She spent the night popping out of bed.
Did you hear about the granny who plugged her electric blanket into the toaster by mistake? She spent the night popping out of bed.
The hotel we stayed in for our holiday offered bed and board, but it was impossible to say which was the bed and which was the board.
You can’t have any more chocolates tonight. It’s not good for you to go to bed on a full stomach. Oh, Mum. I promise I’ll lay on my side.
Doctor, doctor, I’m having difficulty sleeping. Doctor: Well maybe it’s your bed. Oh, I’m all right at night, it’s in the day I have problems.
I don’t think my Mom knows much about children. Why do you say that? Because she always puts me to bed when I’m wide awake, and gets me up when I’m sleepy!
I woke up, went for a walk, my head fell off and rolled away. I picked it up and put it on. A child walked up to me and said: “Good grief, where are your feet?” I must have left them in bed !
Three boys were sharing the same bed on holiday, but it was so crowded that one of them decided to sleep on the floor. After a while, one of his friends told him he might as well get in to bed again. There’s lots of room now,’ he said.
I’d love you to stay the night, but I’m afraid you’ll have to make your own bed. Oh, that’s all right, I don’t mind at all. Right. Here’s a hammer, a saw, and some nails. The wood’s in the garage. I have four legs, but only one foot. What am I? A bed
Two friends who lived in the town were chatting. “I’ve just bought a pig,” said the first. “But where will you keep it?” said the second. “Your yard’s much too small for a pig!” “I’m going to keep it under my bed,” replied his friend. “But what about the smell?” “He’ll soon get used to that.”
A little boy came downstairs crying late one night. “What’s wrong?” asked his mother. “Do people really come from dust, like they said in church?” he sobbed. “In a way they do,” said his mother. “And when they die so they turn back to dust?” “Yes, they do.” The little boy began to cry again. “Well, under my bed there’s someone either coming or going.”
Doctor, doctor, I keep dreaming there are great, gooey, bug-eyed monsters playing tiddley winks under my bed. What shall I do? Hide the tiddley winks.
A neighbour bumped into Jenny playing outside her house after dark. Hello, Jenny, said the neighbour. Isnt it time for little girls to be in bed? How would I know? asked Jenny. I havent got any little girls.